DOES TENNIS NEED STEROIDS?

08/30/06

Beyond lamenting how yesterday's rain delay halted the flow of match play (and the ever lower television ratings of professional tennis), John McEnroe noted that people think tennis players are wimpy because they won't play in the slightest amount of rain. The USA network then cut back to the showing of last year's Agassi-Blake match, specifically commenting on Agassi's incredible "strength in his pectorals."

It's unfortunate that ex tough guy McEnroe is so quick to reveal his insecurities about how tennis players are viewed as pansies. Perhaps he's attempting an apology on behalf of the new nice guy championship players who fail to carry the bad boy torch that he once carried, even if they are in better shape.

It's also funny that the same criticism has been leveled at soccer players. Indeed, players of both sports are on average smaller than the average steroidal American football or baseball player. They seem more like average men than our towering behemoth-like athletes.

Is this really what's responsible for the sport's low ratings? Perhaps tennis players should start juicing to fire in first serves at 150mph in the pouring rain. Or perhaps we just need Agassi to head butt his next opponent for insulting Steffi in order to drum up more fans. Either way, get rid of the countless commercials that say tennis=upper class luxury.