Excuses run gamut from ridiculous, By: Dave Davies

08/06/06

I took a week's vacation and came back to find that sports lately are all about cheating, getting caught and trying to deflect the blame. Actually, now that I think about it, they've been that way for quite some time.

Tour de France winner Floyd Landis has blamed everything but sour milk for the test result that showed he had elevated testosterone levels in his system.

Landis has said he had naturally high testosterone, then he said it might have come from cortisone shots, then drinking beer and whiskey the night before (that has to be the first time that was ever used as an excuse for steroids), and then thyroid medication. Then he said it might have been a result of dehydration.

Now he really needs that shot of whiskey.

Then there's the tragic case of world-class sprinter Justin Gatlin, the co-world-record holder in the 100 meters, who faces a lifetime ban after failing a drug test in April.

Gatlin's genius coach, Trevor Graham, claims that a vengeful massage therapist used testosterone cream on Gatlin without his knowledge.

The massage therapist said Graham's accusation is untrue, and although Gatlin says he doesn't know how steroids got in his system (Where have I heard that before? Oh yes, now I remember — everywhere), the U.S. Olympic Committee on Thursday banned Graham from its training centers and training sites "based on the unusual number of athletes he has coached who have been convicted of doping offenses."

Well, at least Graham will now have

plenty of time to get to the bottom of all this.

For NFL football fans, there's the great T.O., new Dallas Cowboys receiver Terrell Owens, whose every move and utterance at training camp in Oxnard are recorded, printed and broadcast as if the fate of the world depends on whether he makes a farce of a third professional team.

Personally, I liked Owens when he was a modest, relatively unknown receiver with the 49ers putting up good numbers and making great catches like the won to beat the Packers in the playoffs several years ago.

Then he became "T.O.!" He started doing all these ridiculous end zone celebrations after his touchdowns, as if he'd never been there before and might never get there again. He trashed Niner quarterback Jeff Garcia, yelled at offensive coordinator Greg Knapp on the sidelines, got shipped to Philadelphia after quashing a trade to Baltimore, had one good season and then blew up on the Eagles and quarterback Donovan McNabb and coach Andy Reid.

Thank goodness for local sports.